If brides have a choice, they would invite everyone even those they have not seen for a long time. But, weddings are an expensive event and inviting everyone may not all be possible especially for brides on a tight budget. It is also to expect that creating the guest list may bring trouble particularly when everyone wants a say about who will be invited. However, there is no need to worry, creating your guests list according to the numbers you want, is still possible if you will follow these tips:
Keep it a Secret
Of course you will have to announce your engagement to some of your close family and friends, but other than them, do not immediately announce it to the whole world. Do not tell your wedding to anyone yet unless you are certain about the size and scope of the event or else you would be hearing people asking you “When is the wedding?” and they will soon be expecting for you to give them invitations.
Provide an Equal Share
It does not matter who will pay more. If you are going to have 200 guests, allocate 100 of the invites to you and your groom, while giving the remaining fifty to your family and the next fifty to the groom’s family. If they cooperate well, then your problem is solved. However, if you have a large family while the groom has a small one or vice versa, you will have to re-evaluate on how you will divide the numbers of guests that they can invite.
Beat the Bully
Well, not literally! Most parents and even soon-to-be in-laws may put the pressure on you to give them more invites so that they can invite their own close friends and family especially when they are the ones who will foot the bill. However, you will need to set your own boundaries. Keep in mind that this is your event and not theirs. Some brides even bend down to the pressure by just allowing the parent to pay for their additional guests. However, problems may arise when the reception site itself only allows a certain number of guests. So as a solution the bride and her groom would invite fewer guests just so they can accommodate the parent’s guests. Make certain that both parents understand that this is a celebration for everyone involved, and everyone must participate equally. Try not to bend down since you may still be the last one to pay for it.
Organize it Early
As soon as you know the date of your wedding, create your first partial list that includes their names and their addresses. You could use an Excel spreadsheet and store it in your iPad or tablet, or you could also search for a guest list manager online so that you can easily access your list anywhere you are. The sooner you have this organized the better the chances of not having add-on guests. Also, the names and addresses that you will be collecting will be used many times. They will be used when you hand out the wedding invitation, for the seat assignments and when you give them thank-you notes.
Prepare a Second String of Guests
If you are aiming to invite around 200 guests that is your A-list, make an additional 40 more to be included in your B list. Your 200 guests will be receiving the first round of invites. However, not everyone would be able to come. The added 40 guests will make up for those who are not coming. Once you get at least 40 A-list regrets, start working down on your B-list. Send a few invites at a time until you hit your 200 guest list target.
Don’t Forget their Names on the Response Card
Most of the time guests are also tricky by sending back the RSVP with two names although the invitation was meant for one. However, you can ask your calligrapher to write the full names of the invited guests on the RSVP card. Then, after their names, include a black line whether they are attending or sending regrets. That way, there will be no chance that they can force an unwanted guest on you.
Who will be Cut
At some point you will also have to cut some from your list. Better create a criterion that is mostly acceptable to you. Here are some ways to do it.
- If you have never heard, met or spoken to a guest your mom wants you to invite, cut her out from your list. The same goes for an old friend you haven’t seen for a long, long time.
- Do not invite children below 12 years old especially if your wedding goes all night.
- Single friends who are in a relationship for more than a year or more can bring their significant other.
- It is your party. You can invite anyone you want and not invite those you don’t like. With the right preparation and consideration, creating the right number for your guest list will be easy.